- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Borrow money from pessimists ~ they don't expect it back.
- Half the people you know are below average.
- 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
- A conscience is what hurts when all the other parts feel so good.
- A clear conscience is a sign of bad memory.
- If you want a rainbow, you've got to put up with the rain.
- All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
- I almost got a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.
- OK, so what's the speed of dark?
- How can you tell when you are out of invinsible ink?
- If everything seems to be going on well, you have obviously overlooked something.
- Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
- When everything seems to be coming your way, maybe you're in the wrong lane.
- Ambition is a lousy excuse for not being smart enough to be lazy.
- Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
- I intend to live forever ....... so far, so good
- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
- Eagles may soar, but pigs don't get sucked into jet engines.
- What happens if you get scared half to death ..... twice?
- My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I've made your horn louder!"
- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- A conclusion is the place that you got tired of thinking.
- Experience is what you don't get until just after you needed it.
- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
- Everyone has got photographic memory; some just don't have film.
- If your car could travel at the speed at light, would your headlights work?
Do you have any to add to the list?
20 comments:
"the more a rumor is denied, the more it tends to be true"
This is too witty!
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have.
"Never argue with a fool. Someone watching may not be able to tell the difference"
"Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness"
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits"
"It usually takes a long time to find a shorter way"
"The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others"
and
sorry for spamming :P
JD, Will,Bob,Greenie ~ Thanks for the additions. Looks like a feast! :)
Spammer ~ Wow, thanks. No apologies please, I love Spam ... the canned ones too. ^_^
+Ant+
I remember something someone once said: if they're experienced doctors - why are they running a "practice"?
I literally had to agree! :P
Sam ~ I think the same applies to lawyers as well, right? hehe
+Ant+
Everyone has got photographic memory; some just don't have film.-> sound like me..no film :)
Beng ~ Ey, why say that? I believe you are overloaded with many rolls. ^_^
+Ant+
"You laugh at me because I am different, but I laugh at you because you are all the same."
"An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind."
Hahahahaha...
I love the Barbie one
We dont need what we want and we dont want what we need.
"If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of
tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for."
Deal All ~ Thank you so much for your inputs. Have a wonderful weekend ya! ^_^
+Ant+
I am so amazed by all of them, so true.
Congratulations! I love so many of your posts. Please write and share more. You think very well.
Anonymous ~ Awwww, thanks. I'm sure everyone who blogs, well, most of them put a lot of thought into theirs as well. Can I come into ur blog too, please don't be shy shy ler! :P lolz
Thanks again. Have a good weekend ya. ^_^
+Ant+
This came in super late:
"There are no stupid questions, only stupid people" -- Mr Garrison, South Park.
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